I keep using lame-ass “the opponent” names for targets of damage in my little D&D damage-calculation ramblings. Let’s make this formal.

Introducing Sir Punching Dummy

Curriculum Vitae

Sir Punching Dummy, blessed at birth with a miraculous 180 Constitution Score, progressed as a capable and multi-faceted Fighter for years, his well being due in no small part to his +85 Hit Point bonus every level.

After amassing much fame and fortune, Sir Punching Dummy (henceforth known as SPD) finally acheived the pinacle of core D&D Rulebook progression: Level 20. Tragically, shortly after earning this vaulted position, he was struck down by a Permanent Feeblemind spell. Now he wanders about aimlessly in his Palace, where young adventurers take potshots at him in his Armor Resplendant. From time to time his loyal servants change his armor, providing the writer with a handy variable Armor Class for SPD.

Pertinent Stats

As the kindly Sir Punching Dummy doesn’t have a mean bone in his nigh-indestructable body, his attack bonus is irrelevant. Suffice to say it’s at least +20 with any weapon known to Man or Beast

Sir Punching Dummy has exactly 1887 hit points at 20th level (he rolled well too, apparently)

SPD has access to a mind-boggling array or armors and armaments at his disposal, ranging from a lowly set of unenchanted Hide Armor (of sentimental value: it belonged to the first Orc he killed) to the Lofty Full Plate +5 of… Everything.